Iris (eleventh_end) wrote in privatexidaho,

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{ KH - Zexion Goes to the Grocery Store }

Written in thirty minutes after starpollution and I had a very in-depth, intelligent discussion regarding Zexion's ability to carry groceries.

Series: Kingdom Hearts (2)
Character(s)/Pairing(s): Zexion, Lexaeus
Rating: PG
Warning(s): n/a
Summary: Zexion goes to the grocery store and buys some food for his co-workers.
Status: Oneshot / Complete

“Sir, will you need help taking these to your car?”

Zexion glares at the boy indignantly. Never mind that the brat is a foot taller than him – he still manages to come off as intimidating, and the bagger lets out a sheepish laugh. “Aha, never mind. Your total is, um... $2,116.13. Holy crap.”

Pulling out his wallet, Zexion hands the teenaged employee a credit card, all the while tapping his foot impatiently. He hates having to grocery shop for the Organization. Usually Vexen handles the task, but today, he refused to. Apparently, he has some sort of ‘experiment’ to perform with VII.

Zexion quickly decides not to think about that.

Taking back the credit card, the schemer turns to face the numerous bags he has to carry. It’s enough food to last them a month; after all, while they lost their hearts, they didn’t lose their stomachs. Eating is still necessary for their survival.

As he surveys the bags, the boy behind the checkout counter pipes up again. “Uh, are you going to be able to handle all that? Don't you even want a cart?”

Zexion’s head whips around, his eyes narrowing darkly. “Offer me assistance one more time, and you will no longer be in the realm of the sane.”

The boy gulps audibly and starts to ring up the next customer’s items. He doesn’t bother Zexion again.

VI calmly reaches over to pick up the first bag. It only has a few loaves of bread inside, along with a box of noodles. Nothing he can’t handle.

The next bag consists of two liters of milk and a bottle of apple juice. He almost loses his balance, but miraculously, he remains standing.

Bags three and four are filled with Demyx’s gummy snacks, Lexaeus’s graham crackers, and those ridiculous popsicles that both the Superior and Roxas are obsessed with. Zexion balances them carefully, quite aware that several other customers are beginning to stare at him.

The fruits and vegetables are in the fifth bag, while the assortment of meat is in the sixth. He can smell the sausages, ground sirloin, and ham through their packages, and it almost makes him nauseous. Ienzo had been a vegetarian, and his body still rejects the idea of consuming what was once an animal.

The condiments bag is next, all but bursting with ketchup, mustard, salad dressing, and the extremely spicy taco sauce that Axel drinks straight from the bottle. By now, the mountain of bags is so high that he can’t see in front of him, but Zexion stubbornly continues even though his arms are shaking.

Ten minutes later, he has every single bag in his arms, save for one: the sweets. It’s mostly chocolate – Larxene’s request – and these idiotic marshmallow bunnies for Marluxia. Unfortunately, with his hands full, Zexion can’t pick it up.

“You, brat,” he snaps, addressing the bagger, “Put that one on top.”

The teenager quickly obeys, grabbing the bag with shaking hands. He gently places it on the very top of the precarious stack of groceries.

Zexion’s knees buckle and he crashes to the floor.

There’s a gasp from the assembled crowd, and the boy bites his lower lip uncertainly. “Are you sure you don’t want any help...?”

Lexaeus looks up from his mug of cocoa as Zexion storms into the kitchen, pushing a grocery cart in front of him. There’s salsa in his hair, and even from here, Lexaeus can see the milk that’s dripping down the front of VI’s jacket.

He smiles faintly in amusement. “So, I take it grocery shopping went well?”

“If you possess any intelligence at all, you will wisely shut up.”

~ fin.
Tags: kingdom hearts, lexaeus, pg, writing, zexion
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